恭喜发财! It is finally time to usher in the Year of the Rat. Being the high-flyers of CowShlt Inc, i believe many Cowlings will be visiting our Singapore Ministers during this Chinese New Year. The ministers, being all human, receive and distribute angpows too during this festival. Cow Peh will like to remind all Cowlings of the following unspoken rules when visiting them in order to prevent any unhapppiness from arising.
If you are visiting......
Transport Minister: Your angpow will be automatically deducted the moment you cross through his door. The amount to deduct will depend on whether you are visiting the minister during the peak hours.
Environment Minister: You are encouraged to open your angpow on the spot and dispose all used angpows into the recycling collection bin.
Home Affairs Minister: Your angpow will first go through an x-ray screening before landing on the minister's hand.
Information, Communication and Arts Minister: Your angpow will be passed to a panel of reviewers. Any inappropriate text or graphic will be censored.
Education Minister: Your angpow will be guaged alongside with your performance from the previous CNY. Your angpow will then be duly ranked under the category of "Value Adding".
Health Minister: You will first need to go through a series of mean testing before the minister decides how much angpow to give.
Defence Minister: If you are unhappy with the anngpow you received, remember to give feedback through the right channel.
Community Service, Youth and Sports Minister: 15% of your angpow received will be deducted as levy to groom the next generation.
Manpower Minister: Your angpow will be temporary kept by the minister. You will only be able to withdraw your angpow after you turned 65.
Finance Minister: Angpow? What angpow? The finance minister is not the Fortune God OK??!
CowShlt Inc wishes all Cowlings Happy Ratty New Year!