Sunday, September 9, 2007

Australia Cows Gear Up to Take Over Horseracing Industry

News Flash!!

Millions of Cows in Australia are gearing themselves up to take over the horseracing industry with the recent outbreak of Horse Flu Virus in that country.

The ground in Australia is abuzzed with news that the local Cows are all ready to invade the horseracing tracks with the recent outbreak of Horse Flu Virus in that country. Many Cows were reported ditching their fields in search of glory and the lucrative prizes from the gambling industry.

Mr Cow Money, a resident Cow from New Cows Wales, said to the reporter, "Gamblers always claim themselves to be investors. And to an investor, what is more appealing than a Bullish Market? I am sure gamblers all over Australia will welcome the replacement of Cows over horses on the racetracks."

Another Cow, who chose to remain anonymous, said, "I think the timing is right. We had been undergoing intensive resistence training by pulling bullock carts and ploughing the field. And when once we release the weights, i believe we can really jump over the moon. Hey! That poem wasn't meant as a fairytale OK?!!"

A Sick Horse Imperial Trainer (S.H.I.T), who declined to be interviewed, was heard mumbling to himself, "Those Cows really hit the Bull's Eye this time......"

The Cow's Domestic Union of Non-profitable Groups (CowDUNG) made this statement. "The Cows in Australia generated the most profits for this country. Our products always top the country's export list. We works daily, regardless rain or shine. So, why must the biggest prize be always reserved for the horse which runs for less than a minute? It is time for the Cows to claim back the glory which rightfully belongs to us!"

When reminded about the similar situations faced by the Cows during the spread of Mad Cow Disease, CowDUNG only replied, "That was the time when the people kept squeezing our female workers breasts. It will be their time to get mad when they start squeezing their own balls when watching our bulls race."